The Singaporean Dream

We had heard of the AMERICAN DREAM..... let me present the SINGAPOREAN DREAM!

1. Live in Condonimium (Any district fine as long as it is condo lah. Have swimming pool, gym, bbq pit. Very important to have the word "Park", "Villa", "Rise" or any condo sounding words in the name. )

2. Son must be Low Ya (lawyer) and daughter must be Lok-the (doctor). Son-in-law preferred to be sign-on one (no 1st sgt or 2nd sgt ah, only ssss-kor-la need apply because must got stars one then after 45 got future... can go gahmen board lah. If not, sure go join AIG sell in-su-ren)

3. Have maid to do housework. No time to wash clothes lah. Maid also must get Filippino, the Ferrari and Lamboghrini of maids. Tell people my maid from Philippines is like driving a luxury car.

4. Must strike 1 time.. just 1 time TOTO jackpot during Chinese New Year (the biggest toto every year) or just 1 time 1 time tui bey pio (strike 4D) saturday and sunday both 1st prize... private or gahmen also can. If not, every week tin kong po bi win every EPL match betting... half ball, 1 ball, 2 ball or no ball also can. Just one time big one.

5. CPF account FAT FAT, so can withdraw 1 time and go batam start a 2nd life, not play computer one.

6. SARFA & NTUC membership - these 2 are the essential membership to cheap chalets, gyms and karaoke!

7. Wife or Husband must maintain body shape after marriage. eh, round or pear shaped not counted sia!

8. Gahmen everyyear cut this cut that and give shares or money every time there is election. Gahmen also must sack all those scholar sitting in office all day to think of new ways to make money of us. I hope every year election then got more cuts and money.

9. ERP and MRT prices better dun rise and COE drop ah!

Finally,.......

10. Be able to spot every single speed camera and "cop on the top" so can brake in time lah and hoh...CTE dun accident and jam every night can?!?!?!